Emergency Planning--Dr. Seuss Style

Tomorrow is Dr. Suess' birthday and in honor of this auspicious occasion, I would like to talk about emergency food storage in the manner that Dr. Suess would discuss it. I am a picky eater, I'm getting better (as in, I no longer exclusively order off the children's menu) but I'm still not sure that I would eat some of the "emergency rations" that come in some emergency kits.

I know, I know, if I was hungry enough I would eat anything (case-in-point: reduced fat frozen "entrees"), but why punish myself or my family? That's why I have a sweet little butane burner that is rated for indoor use, a case of extra butane and a selection of foods that can be made on one burner with no electricity. Why would I subject myself to canned meat, Coast Guard food pellets or protein bars when the wonders of Velveeta Shells and Cheese are right at my finger tips?! Anyway, happy birthday to Dr. Suess, this one's for you!

Powdered Eggs and Spam

I do not like powdered eggs and spam

I do not like them DEM-I-Am

I will not eat them after a flood

I would not eat them if I was stuck in mud

I will not eat them in a quake

I would not eat them, I want a steak

I would not eat them in a storm

I will not eat them in any form

That is why I have a plan

A stove, some butane and not canned ham

I have a pot, I have a pan

I have a burner, I could make some flan

Well, ok, that’s a bit of a stretch

However, some nice soup I could certainly fetch

Some pancakes, some noodles, some chili with beans

Eating lousy food in an emergency? There’s just no need.

I do so like emergency plans

Thank you, thank you DEM-I-AM!

There you have it. You're welcome.